the in-between

What really sucks about being diabetic is when you hover in the in-between. On the one side is your body screaming that you feel sick, can’t really concentrate  and should take a break. On the other side is your mind screaming you don’t have time for breaks, you are not as bad as you could be and are you sure you’re not kidding yourself into getting out of work? The answer is my set failed today. My blood sugar hit 27. I then dropped to 6, climbed back to 16 and am now sitting at 9 all within 4 hours and one correction. I feel sick. I am sick. I should not try and study.


But I want to and feel I need to and am very aware of the deadline creeping closer and closer towards me.  I don’t even know how to get an extension on an extension and that won’t really help me anyway because there is another essay and a test and time is running out. The more I do nothing, even for the right reasons, the worse I feel. I get depressed and anxious and that makes it even harder to concentrate.


I hate the in-between.


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