This week I have had two hypos that have not had badly low numbers but have left me unable to talk or use my limbs properly. I have only ever had one of those in my diabetic life. So one in 20 years then two in 2 days.
Saying calm is hard. It is scary. I want to go through every fraction of my life for what changed. I feel I have to find a fix.
But the reality is sometimes bad things happen and there is not a cause or a change and there is not a fix. Even the ‘best’ diabetic will go hypo and there will be a chance it is one that has you staring at your dog unable to make his name leave your lips. There is every chance any diabetic could end up with their tongue pressed between their lips as they stare at their smartphone and try get their fingers to stay still enough to type out a message to their mother saying ‘you have to phone my work cause I can’t talk…or do much of anything.’
I just have to move on. As Grump would say I need to ‘live long and bolus’. The Grumpy Pumper is a wonderful blog and twitter to follow. Listening to him taught me a lot about not getting down on myself when bad things happen; especially when they are completely out of my control. He tweets more often than he blogs but is absolutely worth a follow if you have somehow not heard of him yet.
I mean, the closest I can get to reasoning is the horrendous humidity but I can’t predict or control the weather. So sometimes you have to just try not panic and sometimes you have to just keep going and sometimes that means eating cereal with your hands cause you keep dropping the spoon and that is fine. Tomorrow will still be there.